Come Kick In Some Doors In Afghanistan

"Roust People from their beds in the new Canadian Army"

The Harpoville Post reports that the new fighting image of the new Canadian soldier was delivered today with a less than stellar showing. The Harpo Governments desire to lure 6,500 young men and woman to a life of war in Afghanistan may have just got a little harder with they're new 3 Million dollar recruitment slogan "Fight Fear, Fight Distress, Fight Chaos". The old slogan "Be All That You Can Be" was dropped for "Fight Terror" but, that one was dropped because it sounded too much like the 2004 G.W. Bush re-election campaign slogan.

The Harpoville post has learned that the military has released the ads in low employment areas of Canada like the Atlantic provinces but, so far has met with very negative results. With reading and writting at a grade six level dropped from the requirments earlier this year the military has decided to drop any physical fitness requirments come October in the hope of building up recruitment numbers by the pound in sheer mass volume.

The Harpoville Post has learned of some alternate slogans that were passed over were; "Be Less With More", "I'm OK, You're Good Enough" and "We're Not Looking For The Best Just a Bunch"