America Considers Alberta Unsecured

"Canada considers Ralph Klein insecure"

The Harpoville Post reports that Alberta preimere Ralph Klein is looking for love in all the wrong places as he and the Alberta "Love Me" committee journeyed to Washington DC this week to hold an old fashion Alberta "love in". It seems, now Ralph is nearing the end of his 100 year reign over that province, his level of insecurity is sky rocketing as is his dance card and expense account to travel down and show America who's full of gas.

The Harpoville Post has learned that Ralph, like Prime Minister Harpo is lead by polls and has been out polling Americans to show them how stupid they are when it comes to where their gas and oil comes from. In one of Alberta's recent American polls 38% of our dim witted neighbours to the south think they're gas comes from Saudi Arabia. "This dolts have no idea how important I am." Klein was overheard remarking to no one in particular. In another Alberta/America poll 41% of Americans said they would pay more money for gas and oil knowing it came from Alberta. "I guess it's time to up the price." King Klein muttered under his breath while a room full of Americans ignored him.

The Harpoville Post reports that there was one group polled that did not let Ralph's words go unheeded and this group is starting to question why, if so much of America's oil and natural gas comes from this Alberta, as he calls it, are we letting a numb-skull like Klein handle it.