Thursday, June 01, 2006

Mishitgan Shuts Out Toronto's Shit

"We're tired of being called Mishitgan"

The Harpoville Post reports that Toronto has been shut out of the Mishitgan shit collecting business because Mishitgan says Toronto shit isn't up to that states high shit stacking standards. As of this August one Toronto will have to find someone else to suck up to and accept the 30 truck loads of shit waste it's been sending into Mishitgan landfill sites everyday since,... since,.... since,.... well forever.

"Saying no to Toronto's shit is like saying no to Toronto's assholes"

The Harpoville Post has learned that for years Toronto has been trying hard to prove to the world it's a world class city by shipping it's shit to Michigan but, those days are over and Michigan say's soon the shit train stops short of the Sarnia border crossing. For the past few years Michigan feels it's been short changed at the quality of shit Toronto's been slopping into that states landfills sites and they want it to stop.

"Mishitgan's shit-sledge has slamed shut Toronto's shit chute."

The Harpoville Post suspects Toronto feels pretty special and sees no problem in sneaking its shit into un-suspecting landfill sites in other spots throughout the area. The Harpoville Post spoke to Toronto shit specialist Sandra Shinola who told us, "Toronto is a world class city with some world class shit and if Mishitgan doesn't want to cash in on what Toronto has to offer culturally well, they can shove it. There are lots of needy communities sucking up to us, as we speak, who would love to climb aboard Toronto's shit wagon for the slow, sweet shit ride of their life." Ms. Shinola then added, "You know, 30 truckloads of grade 'A' Toronto shit a day, I'm mean that's not something you can easily turn your nose up to."


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