Holy War, this ain't no stinkin' Holy War

"You can be alot of things in Afghanistan
but, Christan ain't one of them"

"This guy's nuts"

The Harpoville Post has learned of an Afghani mans conversion that may cost him more than just his Sunday morning in church, it may cost him his life. Abdul Rahman, a 40 year old man that converted from the Muslim to Christian faith in a country made up of 99.9 percent Muslims, and may be put to death for his choice of choice religions. Abdul was arrested by police after he was spotted driving around Kabul with a small fish insignia on the back of his car, a bobbing-head Jesus on his dash and a holy bible tucked beneath the drivers seat.

The Harpoville Post reports that the United Church Of Canada has called on Prime Minister Harpo to use Canada's 2,190 troops, stationed in Afghanistan, to save this lone crazy Christan from loosing his head. They have suggested that a Canadian-Christan-led-coalition be put together to promote (religious) human rights.

Holy War?
"I don't remember voting for no stinkin' Holy War"

The Harpoville Post has learned that, after being urged by the church, Prime Minister Harpo contacted Afghani President Hamid Karzai who told Harpo, "Harpo, where you been, like I told you when you were here, this is Afghanistan, what goes down in Afghanistan stays in Afghanistan." he then added, "Anyway, we plan to run some psych. tests on the guy and I'm sure they'll find him nuts, this is a Muslim country, why would you go Christan, if you don't have to. Anyway, I'm sure he'll walk, well, walk is a figure of speech, he'll be beaten, thrown in prison and be eating his food puree'd for a long, long time. What can I say it's the 'Afghani way'. So, when can we expect you back in Kabul, and next time bring the little lady, I understand she don't need no burka."

"If it sounds like one and smells like one
It usually is one"