Conservative/Liberal; What's the Difference?

Can you tell the difference?
I can't.

The Harpoville Post has learned that Ethics Commissioner Bernard Shapiro can't tell the difference between the Liberal party and the Conservative party or what's either ethical or unethical.

The Harpoville Post reports that Bernard Shapiro has cleared both Prime Minister Harpo and Conservative Minister of Rough Trade David Emerson of any wrong doing. It seems last weeks threatening of a beheading was enough to cause Mr. Shapiro to get his priorities in order and stop bothering either man.

The Harpoville Post caught up with Mr. Shapiro as he was sneaking out the back door of Harpoville Hall and we asked him why the sudden turn around, and he said "I don't need to talk to either man to know there was nothing wrong with Dave, after many years of being elected Liberal to suddenly jump sides to the Conservative party for a great job with lots of perks, nothing wrong with that at all." We asked Mr. Shapiro if Mr. Emerson received anything for his betrayal to his party to his constituents and for becoming Minister of Rough Trade? He said, "No not really, nothing other than a huge salary increase, a new car and driver and a massive spending account. Other than that, not much, now, I've got to go, he's watching, your not safe either."

The Harpoville Post wonders whether Mr. Shapiro was really afraid or if he suddenly saw his sweet ride on the back of Canadian taxpayers coming to a screeching halt. It seems looking-out-for-number-one is the only constant in 'ethical' Canadian politics.