Sunday, July 02, 2006

Canada Swallows American Softwood Deal


"Conservatives roll even further over to let Americans drive it in"

The Harpoville Post reports that like a hooker on Jasper Ave. during a oil boom, the Harpo governments desire for fast cash and a quick finish to the long and dragged out softwood issue with America may be in the near future but, like Jasper Ave. when the sun comes up it's not a pretty sight.

The Harpoville Post has learned that just as pen was to hit paper the Americans came whining back with a new clause to the mega document, this one is; 'what if we want to change are mind.' It must be obvious to most by now that dealing with Americans is pretty much like negotiating with a crack-whore that won't pay her rent or vacate because most days she can't remember where she lives. Months ago the WTO said America should cough up the 5.2 Billion it stole from Canadian softwood dealers in unfair tariffs not to mention what that country over charges it's own people in extra softwood taxes but, like that crack-whore, America wouldn't let go until the Harpo Government let them keep over 1 Billion to pay the slimy lawyers who slid through every slimy loop hole imaginable for years trying to keep it. Then this spring the new Harpo Government looking for an easy lay to help fatten their ego and their bank roll got, ex-liberal, Dave Emerson all dolled up in spandix and glitter and sent him to Washington to suck up some favors to put this baby to bed.

The Harpoville Post reports that unfortunatly even 'dolled up Dave' is no lady and soon the deal that was in jeopardy. So Dave, not one to disappoint broke out the KY rolled over a little further and let the Americans not only do all the screwing but, keep the cash and let them change they're mind and leave the party before they crinkle the sheets and cut the cake.

"How embarrassing"

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