New Polls Scare The Shit out of Conservatives

"Smell that? It's like the whole Conservative caucus just shit their pants"

The Harpoville Post reports that a recent poll has Harpo's Government neck and neck with the Liberals and that's with a Libeal party without a Liberal leader. The news must have hit the Conservative quite hard because once they cleaned out their pants they went about purging the party of any rotten fruit they feel they might have ingested. First to go was long time Conservative party member Garth Turner, who's been around since the early 90's, which was back when there was a real Conservative party but who now sits alone, with one other guy, in the cheap seats with a little plaque labled "Independant".

The Harpoville Post has learned that even Garth didn't see this one coming but he must of smelled it from a long way away after months of writting his blog and voicing his 'much needed opinion' on the inner workings of this new Conservative Government. Prime Minister Harpo was too busy in the toilet to do the dirty himself and left it up to the Ontario Conservative wing, the weakest of the bunch, to give Garth a wedgy, they've long desired before sending him on his way. The Prime Minister's office is swearing the fifth for Harpo who was no where to be seen, heard from or asked when the press came a calling which leads one to suspect; "Isn't that the way he really wants it."

The Harpoville Post reports that the Harpo 'cone of silence' is stretching further and farther than anyone could have suspected when the Prime Minister says he wants a more "open and accountable government" he means seal all the leaks and batten done the hatchs which really means cut anyone from the party that has his own opinion and the balls enough, whether they smell of shit or not, to voice them.