Sunday, February 12, 2006

The KING is 'in' The Building

Hail, Hail the Kings all here.

The Harpoville Post is pleased to report The King of America, G.W. Bush himself, made a suprise visit to Harpoville to meet with our grand leader Harpo.

Had the good patrons of Harpoville known, beforehand of his visit they would surly have lined the streets with a welcome fit for a King.

The King of America did not come empty handed when he arrived in Harpoville, he disembarked from Air Force One with a big book of great knowledge all grand rulers should possess.

Entitled Presidency For Dummies, G.W. himself poclaimed "Although this book is written in Americian, I'm sure it will translat well into Canadianese" to which he added, "It might even translate into French-waw, I don't know you'd have to check on that."
Shortly after that The King of America and our great ruler Harpo retired to 24 Harpoville Row where they could speak in private.

The Harpoville Post was luckly enough to obtain a transcript of this momentious moment in history as these two great leaders converse.

Harpo: It's sure is nice of you to come all the way to Harpoville your Highess, or can I call you Dicky yet.
G.W.: Very funny Harpo, let's cut the shit, where's my cheque?
Harpo: What do you mean sir?
G.W.: You know exactly what I mean, you wanted to be PM I helped you be PM, that don't mean shit to me.
Harpo: We'll I'm finding it quite exciting sir.
G.W.: Are you 'special' or something? Get it through you're thick Canadian skull. I'm out there fighting a war on freedom, and that cost money, lot's of money.
Harpo: I understand sir, but, I put the cheque in the mail this morning.
G.W.: You what?
Harpo: I'm sure Canada Post will deliver it in a few days or weeks.
G.W.: Shit.
Harpo: Well, I hope that wasn't the only reson for your visit.
G.W.: No, I have to get Donni and Marie Rumsfield back in the US.
Harpo: They're leaving Harpoville? They're quite a handsome couple.
G.W.: It doesn't look good having your Secretary of Defence moving to Harpoville so he can marry his gay lover, it's really not the 'American way'. How long is it going to take to get rid of the dame gay marriage law?
Harpo: I'm working on that now sir.
G.W.: Good, we're up to our ass in visa requests, and the Mary's are massing at the border. Anyway I've got to get back, it seems Dick Cheney shot a lawyer in Texas.
Harpo: I hope he's alright.
G.W.: Dickie's fine, thank god it was in Texas or he'd be up shit-creek without a..., without a... creek. We're just not sure if he shot a Republican or a Democrat lawyer.
Harpo: Is there a difference?
G.W.: Very little, but, in Texas there's a bounty on Democrat lawyers, and if he bagged one of those he'll want his money in cash.
Harpo: Well thanks for dropping by sir.
G.W.: Sure, sure, give my best to the misses.
Harpo: I will sir.
G.W.: You did marry a woman didn't you Harpo?
Harpo: Yes sir, I believe I did.
G.W.: Thank god for that, I swear its like everyone is 'special' up here.
Harpo: Thank you sir, and we think your pretty special too.
G.W.: That's not the 'special' I meant, com-pren-dee?
Harpo: I think so sir.
G.W.: See you Harpo, and read that book, it has some good tips on world domination, not that you'll get to use them.


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