Saturday, March 11, 2006

Election Year Terror Look-Out


The Harpoville Post
Weather Update

The Harpoville Post reports with G.W. Bush's approval ratings dropping quicker than a sailors drawers on shore leave, a long range terror lookout will be easy to predict.

The Harpoville Post calls for an unusually warm summer in 2006, this Congressional Election year, leading to an even hotter fall season. Into September, just as summer whines to an end and cooler weather is usually welcomed North Americans can expect higher than usual high-alert terrorist warnings.

The Harpoville Post warns citizens not to be fooled by the high terror warnings, because, although they do heat up the air, it's the cool winds of terror that follow shortly behind. As Americans head off towards polling booths in November of 2006 gail-like-terror-winds will come pounding at their doors as they leave their homes.

The Harpoville Post reports that as the Republicans see their poll numbers decrease and their rapid demise approach it is expected that the White House will increase terror warning from green to blue then from yellow all the way to 'RED' if need be to ensure a fair and fearful-victory.

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