Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Canadians Swarm Across American Border


"While America turns it's attention southward Canadians make their move"

The Harpoville Post reports that while U.S. President G.W.Bush sends in the National Guard to man and protect the U.S./Mexican border Canadians are swarming across unguarded northern border posts. With all eyes fixed southward the northern borders are unmanned and Canadians are streaming across in record numbers.

The Harpoville Post has learned that the Presidents desire to appease the Republican voter, this election year and to stop the constant stream of Mexicans from making their way north, to the promise land and sweet life of long hours and low pay in America, it has left its self open to a different kind of invasion, a 'Canadian invasion'. So, while their eyes are looking elsewhere and their borderguards backs are turned, Canadians are making their break and are moving in.

The Harpoville Post spoke to one American border town citizen and shopkeeper who told us, "Those dame Canadians come here to America expecting free health care, 5% alcohol in the beer and Canadian back-bacon it's like they don't even know they're in America. I had one guy walk in here asking me for something called Poutin, what the hell that is I don't know. And, they're always so fucking polite. They make me sick."

The Harpoville Post reports that Canadians are welcome in America during the winter months when they do jobs Americans refuse to do like snow shoveling, ice scrapping and snow mobile repair but, during the summer months they wander around aimlessly waiting for the first frost and a chance to get back to work.

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